'Selena Gomez: My Mind & Me' Enters the Spiraling Mind of a Popstar and Her Battle with Mental Illness

 

by Darian Scalamoni

    When an artist (or anyone really for that matter) takes a deep dive into their mind and the struggles they face on an everyday basis, it's lauded as a triumph. It's not that that sentiment isn't necessarily true but when a display is put out in the public eye by a celebrity, popstar, actor/actress, etc. some may believe it to be artificial or overexaggerated at times. Within the documentary, Selena Gomez: My Mind & Me, which you can stream on AppleTV+, it is clear that the battles that Gomez has been facing for almost a decade now are raw, emotional and painful. 

    The documentary which began filming in 2015, covers many moments in the popstar and actresses' life from that time up until now, however. The film documents deeply personal moments in Gomez's life as we see her struggles with anxiety, depression, her lupus diagnosis and ultimately, her discovery and struggles with bipolar disorder. With the latter, Gomez was going through a rough time in her career and personal life around 2016 when she had a very public breakup with fellow singer/songwriter, Justin Bieber. Additionally, while Gomez became more famous than ever, she spiraled into a battle with mental illness and physical illness during her worldwide music tour. Sometime between 2012-2014, Gomez was diagnosed with lupus, an autoimmune disease in which one's immune system directly attacks healthy tissue within your body. The film directly speaks to the disease as well as visually documents the physical pain and emotional toll that this disease took on Gomez early throughout her tour. One scene shows Gomez taking a blood pressure test and educating a tour crewmember through that process and what it means for her. She indicates that if the numbers displayed on the machine are too high then there is a risk of stroke. 

    While one would believe that a diagnosis such as this is enough of a struggle for one to deal with, we begin to see the turmoil and spiraling going on in the documentary subject's head. It's also a testament to the direction and editing as we see intercutting of Gomez's interactions with paparazzi invading her every minute that she steps foot into the public sphere, constantly being surrounded by "her team" and being woken up for more press tours, interviews and interactions with fans that, frankly, would drive almost anyone insane. Amidst all this, we learn along with Gomez that she has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder after being admitted into a psychiatric facility following the cancellation of the rest of her tour after performing 55 shows across North America, Asia and Oceania. We get a glimpse of the reaction this sparks from Gomez as she embarks on a journey of healing which includes much-needed time off from the limelight and a trip to Africa that changes her life and perspective completely.

    The film is directed by Alek Keshishian, a filmmaker who started in the industry working directly with musicians directing music videos before turning to his first scripted feature film, With Honors in 1994. Keshishian also worked directly with Gomez on the music video for her single, Hands to Myself, which spawned the director to want to chronicle the singer's life in a more personal documentary. Keshishian said to Variety, that he had "no interest in making a traditional pop doc. I wanted to show something more authentic, and Selena did, too. She has a raw vulnerability that captured me… I had no idea then that it would become a six-year labor of love." It's clear that there is an unguarded approach to the documentary that at times gives the viewer the "fly on the wall" feeling but that's what makes Selena Gomez: My Mind & Me stand out from other celebrity centered documentaries. 

    The overall film covers many facets of Selena Gomez's life such as her upbringing, her childhood experiences, her friendships, relationships with family, her work/life balance and her deconstruction of an image that had been portrayed for many years in the public eye. One scene shows Selena reading question cards about her life, shown basically as a game in which one of her best friends tells Selena that she's always been viewed as an "all-American girl", but she has many deeper layers, interests and desires in her life, My Mind & Me showcases all of those aspects of Gomez's life. 

    Selena Gomez: My Mind & Me is an intimate glimpse into the head and life of the entertainer while also allowing the audience the space to take a look into themselves and any potential struggles they may have. The documentary gives Gomez allowance to deal with her struggles head-on whilst Keshishian sifted through 200 hours of footage to give a side of Selena that the public wasn't prone-to-knowing, necessarily. Through terrific editing work and riveting documentation, Selena Gomez: My Mind & Me is one of the best docs I've seen all year. 

Overall Score: 8.6